Happy Friday!

In case you were concerned about my sanity after reading this post, let me just tell you, today I feel like a new woman!! Last night I got, SEVEN straight hours of sleep! Whoo hoo!

I couldn't go cold turkey with the middle of the night bottle for the boys.... maybe I'm too much of a softy but the timing just doesn't feel right with that one. Still, clearly I need more sleep to function during the day! So, two nights ago we started giving the boys a bottle at 10:00 p.m. (they go to bed for the night at 6:30). For this feeding, we keep them in their cribs (propped though) and only wake them just enough to take the bottle. We don't change their diapers and lift them up just to gently and quickly burp them. For the most part, they've slept through these feedings.

The first night we tried this, they still all woke up at 4 and 5 a.m. wanting a bottle. They were mad when one didn't magically appear. Really mad. I didn't leave them to cry it out on their own (again, the big softy thing). Rather, I hung over cribs rubbing backs, re-inserting pacifiers, gently tossing lovies next to faces and saying almost aloud, "I think I can, I think I can, I think we can...." It was rough but eventually they fell back asleep and I crawled back in bed.

Last night, we went through the same routine at 10:00 p.m., went to bed and next thing I knew, I awoke TO CHRIS'S ALARM AT 6:45!!!!!!!! Just two days ago I was plotting how I could sneak away to a hotel to get some rest (seriously!) and today my wish came true in my own home :-)

Who knows if this sleeping all night thing will continue, but I'm hopeful.

Tonight Chris and I are having a dinner date at home. Our "reservation" won't be until 8:05 after the last kid goes to bed, and the three highchairs lined up at the end of the table will be a dead give away that we're not at a real restaurant but I'm excited. I may even put some make-up on if I can find it. Look out!

Colin and I went to store this morning to buy the ingredients for the menu I have planned tonight:

Olives for an Appetizer
Spinach Salad
Salmon with Mash Potatoes
Cheese Platter
Mochi for Dessert

As we were leaving for the store, Colin yelled, "Wait Mommy! My HAT!"

(Let me explain what he was referring too. Yesterday, the hat part of his Halloween costume arrived in the mail but he didn't see it as a costume, rather just his new every day fall/ winter hat.... which I guess, why not??)

Can you guess what his costume is going to be this year???

This picture could also be entitled, "How to make every elderly person's day at the grocery store" :-)

Off to set the table for my hot date tonight! (aka, clear the empty jars of baby food, used spoons and bibs,  and wipe the table free of smeared butternut squash puree)

Happy Friday everyone!

Will I ever sleep again??

My dear friend Candace called me this morning and boy was I thankful. She also has multiples, although that wasn't what originally drew us together. Our friendship was forever sealed over tacos in the middle of a Malagasy village, during our time in the peace corps. Who would have thought ten years later we'd also share the bond of parenting multiples? My wish for all parents who have multiples is that they have someone they can call and blab on and on about the challenges that come with multiples and hear someone on the other line say, "I know. I've been there. It gets easier." And my favorite line from Candace today, "I promise, you will sleep again." I sooooo needed to hear that today!

With the exception of a few good nights, the trips have not been sleeping well for what feels like a very long time now. Actually, even as I type this I must admit, individually they are all great sleepers... I don't think I'd have an issue with any one of their sleep patterns if they weren't part of a trio. Collectively they are causing me to be up A LOT at night. At first I attributed it to teething, then back to back colds that hit us hard, then maybe teething again... but who knows really.

All I know is I'm exhausted. Really exhausted. I have such an immense amount of respect for the parents who are all up night with kids and then somehow go into work and hold down a job. Wow.

Some time ago, we stopped waking the other babies whenever the first baby would wake up for a bottle during the night. This is because rather than reinforcing the message that you need to wake up and eat, we wanted to reinforce the message that "you don't! Sleep as long as you can!" But they all still get up for a bottle, just all at different times now. The times are not always predictable either. So sometimes there are a couple hours between each of the babies bottle, sometimes just 30 minutes- or less. I find lately I'm not even able to fall into a deep sleep because a part of me is just waiting for the next baby to wake up and want their bottle.

I'm debating whether or not to drop the middle of the night bottle..... cold turkey. I'd still go in and soothe the babies, but just not feed them. Our pediatrician says they're ready and actually I feel they are too. I just HATE forcing milestones rather than letting them organically happen in their own way and time. At the same time, I need sleep and maybe these boys just need a little push to drop the bottle and in return get a mommy that can see straight during the day....

I don't know, I gotta think on it.

p.s.- lest anyone thinks I'm complaining too much... Believe me, even in my sleep deprived state and even when it's 3 a.m. and I haven't slept yet.... a piece of me is still grateful. Seriously. If you've ever longed for a baby you know what I mean. I'd way rather be loosing sleep over tending to babies then loosing sleep over wishing for one.

p.p.s- if there are a million spelling and grammar errors in this post, it's because I'm so exhausted.... have I mentioned that yet???? :-)

Chris and Carter, this morning at Carter and Finn's cardiology appt (more on that tomorrow). How I wish I could sleep like a baby.... or like my husband who can crash anywhere, anytime!

Nap saga re-visited

Below is something I wrote a while back, before coming to the hospital, but forgot to post. I just recently found it again. 


So since I've been thinking about sharing this blog with others, I ended up going back and reading through some of my old entries. I wondered, "What HAVE I written about?" Because I know there are days where I've felt tired, challenged, and overwhelmed by motherhood and writing about those moments has been equally as therapeutic for me as writing about the good times, and the really great times. 

It was actually fun to re-read old postings about days spent with my son that I'd forgotten about. I also noticed that issues I thought were SUCH a big deal, now looking back, were not. "Nap Wars" as I referred to the time period where colin was suddenly not napping, are a great example of this. Back in late summer/ early fall, my awesome little sleeper, suddenly wasn't napping and I couldn't figure out why. At the time I felt so overwhelmed by it all, wondering if he would EVER sleep again. What I wish I knew then that I know now, is that no phase or issue lasts forever.  I'd love to go back and tell myself relax, this too shall pass. 

Because it did. 

And the interesting part, which I never wrote about, is that what really worked in the end. There was no magic solution that got him to sleep. But what finally shifted things was that I eventually just used the approach that felt right to ME, following my own motherly intuition, rather than focusing on what I felt I SHOULD be doing. 

At the time, what Colin really wanted was to nap in our bed. I kept thinking that he just shouldn't nap in our bed, but I had no good reason. Actually, I laugh thinking back on this now but part of the reason I thought he should just get used to napping in his own bed was because I was newly pregnant and I thought when the baby comes (singular!), we can't have him in our bed. If I'd known then that it wasn't just a baby but rather three babies, I may have gone over the edge!

Chris and I ended up deciding that kids are little for such a short period of time so what's the big deal if he naps in our bed, or even comes into our bed at night?? I realize that not every family would come to this conclusion but the important thing was simply that we can to the right decision for us. Allowing him to co-sleep with us is what felt right in our gut. That was what my intuition had been screaming all along, so why didn't I just listen to me? Ironically, once we allowed little c to sleep with us again whenever he needed to, he quickly just started staying in his own bed. Go figure. 

Still today, he almost always naps in our bed. Since being pregnant with triplets and starting to nap each afternoon myself, I must say that I love napping together. Wouldn't have it any other way. If I don't nap, then he's fine napping by himself, just prefers to be in our bed. At bedtime he goes to bed incredibly easily, in his own bed. During the night, usually we don't hear from him until morning, but occasionally he'll cry and want to come into bed with us. And that's just fine with us.

God gave us intuition for a reason and I think as mothers sometimes we ignore it based on what some "expert" book says, or well meaning advice we get from others. But every kiddo is different and what's right for every family is different. 

I sometimes worry about what we'll do as we also raise triplets. Everything I read seems to indicate that "getting them on a sleep/ feeding schedule and the same sleep/ feeding schedule is critical!" Yikes. That worries me because adhering to strict schedules is not really our style as parents, especially with a baby (although I can certainly imagine why having three babies on the same schedule is helpful!) Then I came across this blog post and I LOVED IT! Reading about a mom of triplets who admitted that adhering to a strict schedule isn't what made sense to her, not what worked for her, put my mind at ease that there are many different ways to approach mommyhood, even if you're raising multiples.