Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Mr. Independence

Dear Colin,

Last Saturday your brothers and I were supposed to travel two hours over to Mom-mom and Pop-pop's house while your Dad renovated the guest bathroom. Then on Saturday, some of your brother's weren't feeling well and so we made a decision to have Mom-mom and Pop-pop go ahead and then we'd meet up on Sunday when hopefully everyone was feeling better.

Just before they were to leave, you announced that you'd like to go with them! By yourself. Without your brothers and without me.

"Mommy PLEASE can I go?" you said.

I didn't think you'd really go through with it. This idea had never occurred to you before.

But there you were excitedly packing your backpack and asking me to take your picture.

Just look at that confidence!

That is a five year old boy, heading off to his grandparents house for an adventure!

Still, I thought once you got in the car, that you'd back out. You didn't.

Then I thought that you'd get an hour down the road, miss us and want to come home. You didn't.

Finally, I thought for sure that before bed, you'd start to get homesick and miss me. I worried about how I'd get to you over two hours away..... because of course I'd have to come. But you didn't need me.

You had a blast going out to dinner with them, eating popcorn, getting the toys ready for your brothers..... and basically doing all the special grandparent/ kiddo stuff that you get to do when you sleep over. Yup, you were fine. Me, not so much! I missed you like crazy. I kept texting Mom-mom, "Is he okay??" but of course, you were just fine. Doing awesome actually.

Then Mom-mom texted me:

"He's asleep. He took his camera to bed because he said in case he misses you he can look at your picture. Before he went to bed he looked at your picture and said, "I love you Mommy". But he wasn't sad, he's excited to be here and to see you guys tomorrow."

Ummmm, cue tears! I was a mess. And yet thrilled for you that you were having this positive adventure at Mom-mom and Pop-pops and that you were doing so well!

Mom-mom said that in the morning when she went to check on you, you were sitting up in bed fully dressed! Mr. Independence!

I gave you the biggest hug when we arrived on Sunday! You excitedly showed us around and told us all about the special things you did together!

When I see these growth spurts happening, it makes me so happy for you. But I also have to stop myself from thinking too far in the future and how your growing up so fast.

Now as a parent, I can only imagine how hard it must have been for my own parents to put me on a plane to Africa (at 22), and wave goodbye for two years (although I came home for a visit during that time). I suppose they loved me enough to let me have my own adventures and follow my dreams. But man, it's hard to let go. I know, I know, it was ONLY two hours away and it was ONLY one night!

For now though, Mom-mom and Pop-pops is far enough! (and I'm proud of you)

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