Thanksgiving Eve

Lot's of cooking and prepping going on over here!

I may be the only mom HAPPY to hear her child up way past his bedtime

Yesterday I hitched a ride back to michigan, to hang with my parents until Thanksgiving. Chris stayed back to... you guessed it..... work on the house! The story of our life these days.

The good part about the car trip was that Colin slept almost the WHOLE WAY and therefore didn't make a fuss at all- almost 4 hours. The bad part was that he slept the whole way and I knew that meant he'd be up late. I on the other hand, hadn't slept a wink and was exhausted from the trip.

So while I went to bed, my dad stayed up with colin. When I left them, they were both sitting side by side on the couch watching a football game.

As I drifted off to sleep I could hear the two of them downstairs laughing and cheering and just having the best time together. It sounded like two old friends reconnecting. Never mind that one is 20 months and the other is 62 years old.

I can't put into words how much that makes my heart smile. When my dad got sick I'd often fall asleep just hoping and praying that he'd be around to influence my children the way he's influenced me. And now I get to fall asleep hearing it happen.

What a blessing.

If you're not shopping second hand.....

Today was pretty much the most productive day I've had in 16 weeks! Wohoo!

Today was my last day of work, which was both sad as well as liberating. It was sad to say goodbye to the amazing families and kiddos that I've been working with on saturdays, but also liberating because now I'm able to totally devote my weekends to getting ready for the babies and spending precious time with my little man and husband.

Then after work, my husband and I went to a local baby consignment shop here in the city. If you live in the chicago area, it's called Once Upon a Child and you should totally check it out.

I have to admit that at first, the idea of buying used stuff for my babies kind of rubbed me the wrong way. I love borrowing and trading stuff with girlfriends however, not knowing who exactly used the items prior to my precious babies.... well, I just wasn't sure how I felt about it. So I was sharing these thoughts with a very stylish, smart and savvy friend of mine and fellow mom of multiples and she stopped me dead in my tracks to say, "Jessica, I buy EVERYTHING for the boys from consignment shops!" It's the best secret out there. That was the tipping point that sold me on the idea of scoring second hand items. So today my husband and I hit the consignment shop and let me tell you we made a haul! Seriously, we got two swings, three bouncy seats, and a baby monitor for the price of one of the swings at babies r us. It felt amazing..... and I also suddenly feel smarter than all those other moms still shopping at the high end pricey stores down the street. Suckers!

Truthfully, when I had my first baby, I was that way. I wanted everything to be just perfect and all his baby gear to either be brand new or from friends. I shopped at boutiques in Chicago, and spent a lot of money filling his nursery with beautiful things. And guess what? He didn't care. He just wanted me, my milk, and my love. And he probably spit up on all those high end items.

In the end, babies don't care about that stuff. This time around, I don't even know yet where the triplets will sleep, but I know we'll find a place..... Probably in a second hand pack n play. They won't care.

We ended the day by building a new headboard for our new KING size bed that should arrive shortly.... more about that in a later blog with pictures to follow..... but yes, me and my preggo belly were on the floor constructing a headboard..... I have pictures to prove it!

Not a bad day for a preggo mommy of triplets. Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to go collapse in bed.

Ugh

Today was such a bad day. Colin has been giving me a run for my money. He wants to do construction on the house all day long, just like daddy does when he comes home from work. However, not all power tools are safe for toddlers! And hammering the walls leave marks. He just seems to be pushing back against any and all limits that I set and as a result there have been many tantrums lately. My head knows this is all a normal part of development, but my heart is tired and my patience is waining.

Today tantrums converged with worry about the babies. I wonder, "how will we afford everything that we need to get"? "Will the construction on our home get finished before the babies come"? And the most worrisome question, "Can my body actually carry these babies for the length of time they need". I'm 5'8'', not petite..... but already my body is starting to hurt. My back hurts, my tailbone hurts, and I feel my stomach stretching and pulling. If I stand too long, my body cries out for me to sit. These aches and pains scare me- because I'm only 15 weeks. I pray everyday that my body can go the distance for these little ones.

As my body began to hurt today, as the number of tantrums began to add up, as the worries about everything sank in deeper and deeper, my impatience grew. I was soooooo not the mother I want to be for colin and for these babies today. I was so overwhelmed and frustrated parenting one tantruming toddler and all I could think was, "how will I ever manage to parent four small children in the way that they deserve if I'm struggling so hard with one? I wonder how other moms manage frustration during these times. Most days run smoothly but today.... it was just bad through and through. C never even ended up napping which is usually that time when I can take a deep breath and regroup on challenging days.

I'm praying every day for the strength and the patience to parent four small children. My desire to be the best I can for them is so pure. I'm not sure I have it in me but I hope to God that I do. I know that I will try my best over and over again.

I look at colin sleeping now beside me as I type this and he just looks so little and innocent.

Tomorrows a new day.

Cookies in Bed

Right now, c and I are sitting in bed, propped up against tons of pillows, eating oatmeal cookies and watching sesame street. I'm sure that I'm once again breaking all sorts of parenting rules- cookies for lunch, eating in bed, him in OUR bed period. But I couldn't care less. We're having a ball. These are the types of relaxed, random, on a whim, fun, shared moments that I worry about missing out on when there are four young kiddos to coordinate. I wonder, will we be so all consumed with keeping a schedule that we miss the moments and the joy that can come from just being spontaneous and breaking the "rules"?

I hope not.

Flutter in my belly

Today, little c and I were settled in for our

afternoon nap, and I was laying on my right side, just drifting off when I felt it.

A distinct kick in my lower right abdomen.

It was so real that I swore colin must have accidentally kicked me but I looked and his feet were nowhere near my belly.

Then it happened again.

It was one of the babies!!

I put my hand over the spot and waited to feel more. I felt one more little "swoosh" and then all was still. I wanted to say, "Come back, do it again!"

With colin, his placenta attached across the front of my uterus. Apparently this is pretty uncommon and one of the "side effects" if you will, is that you don't feel your baby kick and move as much. It's like having a pillow between you and your baby. Towards the end I sure felt him moving, stretching and kicking on my sides but I missed getting to feel the little kicks early on.

To the little babies in my belly: this is YOUR home for however long you need it. Move around, stretch out, kick, get comfy. Grow as big and strong as you can get. I'll adjust.

I'm so thankful for each of you and honored to get to be the one who carries you on this journey to life.

My little giraffe

Colin was a giraffe this halloween. Oh he was so cute. We thought maybe he was too young to go treat or treating door to door but we tried it anyway. He LOVED it! And he carried a special light up bucket given to him by grandpa miller. It was the talk of all the houses we knocked on and the children we passed.

My brave little man

Our little man developed what seemed like just a bad cold a few days ago. He was sooo congested, coughing and miserable. After being up most of the night, I took him into the pediatrician expected him to find an ear infection as well. There was no ear infection, however, the doctor was concerned about how much he seemed to be wheezing and struggling to breath. So they sent us over to Children's hospital to be monitored and possibly admitted. I was trying not to freak out.

At the hospital, they put him in a little gown with bears on it which was adorable and yet frightening at the same time. It seems so unfair that any child should have to be in a situation to wear a mini hospital gown. Although we knew that c wasn't critical (at least that's what I kept telling myself), he had to be poked and prodded as the doctors tried to figure out exactly was was constricting his breathing. At one point Chris and I had to hold him down while the nurses weaved tubes down his nose and into his lungs to suck fluid out. C was screaming and crying and terrified. He looked to us to saved him. It felt awful not to be able to just deck the nurses for touching him, then scoop him up and run out the door. Actually, the doctors were as gentle and as wonderful as they could be in this situation. What a tough job they have.

The only good part was that since it's a Children's hospital, they had tv's in each room and you could choose a movie to watch. I got in bed with c and chris sat right beside the bed. We all cuddled and watched Nemo which c loved. I'd forgotten what a great movie it is.

Around midnight, after ruling out pneumonia, and undergoing many nebulizer treatments, they sent us home. We walked out of the hospital with c on Chris's shoulders and without prompting, c spontaneously started fist pumping the air as soon as they walked through the hospital doors back into the busy city.

I LOVE this kid.